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Page 52
LOCAL PHRASES AND MANNERISMS
It is not always easy to drop the local phrases, colloquial expressions
and mannerisms to which one has been accustomed for a long time. Yet
good society does not tolerate these errors in speech. For they are
errors, according to the standards of educated men and women.
To use such phrases as "How was that" when you mean "What was that" or
"How's things" when you mean "How are you" are provincialisms which have
no place in the cultured drawing-room. One must drop all bad habits of
speech before claiming the "good English which is a passport into good
society."
Mannerisms in speech are evident in nasal expression and muffled words,
spoken through half-closed teeth. We were not meant to speak in that
unbeautiful manner, nor were we meant to gesticulate wildly as some of
our drawing-room orators persist in doing-to the amusement of everyone
else concerned. When you enter the world of good society, drop all your
colloquial phrases and mannerisms behind.
IMPORTANCE OF VOCABULARY
Simple expression has the same advantage over flowery language as a
simple and artistic room has over a room filled with gaudy, inharmonious
embellishments. One is effective, the other defective. And yet to
express ideas simply and correctly, with a regard for polish and poise,
one must have a good command of the language.
Make a resolve, right now, that you will never use a foreign word when
you can give its meaning in English. And also determine now, definitely,
that no matter how popular slang becomes in the less refined circles of
society, you will never use it because you know that it is the badge of
vulgarity. There is nothing quite as beautiful as good, simple English,
when it is spoken correctly.
To know the right word in the right place, to know its correct
pronunciation and spelling, there is nothing more valuable than a good
standard dictionary. If you haven't one-a new revised edition-get one
right away. You can not hope to become a pleasing conversationalist
until you own and use a good dictionary.
An excellent way to increase your vocabulary and perfect your speech is
to talk less, and listen politely while others lead the conversation.
There's a lot of truth in that old maxim, "Speech is silver, but silence
is gold!"
INTERRUPTING THE SPEECH OF OTHERS
It was mentioned previously that the Sioux youth does not speak until he
is first spoken to. This is also true of the young Armenian woman. She
would be horrified at the idea of addressing a woman older than herself,
unless first spoken to. Many other countries observe these courtesies of
speech, with a wholesome effect upon the general culture of the people.
How often, here in our own country, even in the most highly cultivated
society, do we hear a man or woman carelessly interrupt the conversation
of another, perhaps an older person, without so much as an apology! It is
bad form, to say the least, but it is also distinctly rude. No person of
good breeding will interrupt the conversation of another no matter how
startling and remarkable an idea he may have. It will be just as
startling and remarkable a few minutes later, and the speaker will have
gained poise and confidence in the time that he waits for the chance to
speak.
Whispering in company is another bad habit that must be avoided. The
drawing-room or reception room is no place for personal secrets or hidden
bits of gossip. The man or woman commits a serious breach in good
conduct by drawing one or two persons aside and whispering something to
them.
TACT IN CONVERSATION
Be careful not to give too strong an expression of your likes and
dislikes. To master this important point of speech, it is wise to
examine carefully and frankly all your opinions before expressing them in
words. It is necessary that you understand yourself, before you are able
to make others understand you.
In carrying on a conversation in a public place be sure to keep the voice
modulated and do not mention the names of people about whom you are
talking in such a way that anyone overhearing the conversation by chance
could identify them. It is best to avoid all personal talk when one is
in public.
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