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Page 16
Let me consider what I had better do. I cannot leave
the university in the middle of the term. If I were
free, my course would be obvious. I should start at
once and travel in Persia. But would she allow me to
start? And could her influence not reach me in Persia,
and bring me back to within touch of her crutch? I can
only find out the limits of this hellish power by my
own bitter experience. I will fight and fight and
fight--and what can I do more?
I know very well that about eight o'clock to-night that
craving for her society, that irresistible
restlessness, will come upon me. How shall I overcome
it? What shall I do? I must make it impossible for me
to leave the room. I shall lock the door and throw the
key out of the window. But, then, what am I to do in
the morning? Never mind about the morning. I must at
all costs break this chain which holds me.
April 9. Victory! I have done splendidly! At seven
o'clock last night I took a hasty dinner, and then
locked myself up in my bedroom and dropped the key into
the garden. I chose a cheery novel, and lay in bed for
three hours trying to read it, but really in a horrible
state of trepidation, expecting every instant that I
should become conscious of the impulse. Nothing of the
sort occurred, however, and I awoke this morning with
the feeling that a black nightmare had been lifted off
me. Perhaps the creature realized what I had done, and
understood that it was useless to try to influence me.
At any rate, I have beaten her once, and if I can do it
once, I can do it again.
It was most awkward about the key in the morning.
Luckily, there was an under-gardener below, and I asked
him to throw it up. No doubt he thought I had just
dropped it. I will have doors and windows screwed up
and six stout men to hold me down in my bed before I
will surrender myself to be hag-ridden in this way.
I had a note from Mrs. Marden this afternoon asking me
to go round and see her. I intended to do so in any
case, but had not excepted to find bad news waiting for
me. It seems that the Armstrongs, from whom Agatha has
expectations, are due home from Adelaide in the Aurora,
and that they have written to Mrs. Marden and her to
meet them in town. They will probably be away for a
month or six weeks, and, as the Aurora is due on
Wednesday, they must go at once--to-morrow, if they are
ready in time. My consolation is that when we meet
again there will be no more parting between Agatha and
me.
"I want you to do one thing, Agatha," said I, when we
were alone together. "If you should happen to meet
Miss Penclosa, either in town or here, you must promise
me never again to allow her to mesmerize you."
Agatha opened her eyes.
"Why, it was only the other day that you were saying
how interesting it all was, and how determined you were
to finish your experiments."
"I know, but I have changed my mind since then."
"And you won't have it any more?"
"No."
"I am so glad, Austin. You can't think how pale and
worn you have been lately. It was really our principal
objection to going to London now that we did not wish
to leave you when you were so pulled down. And your
manner has been so strange occasionally--especially
that night when you left poor Professor Pratt-Haldane
to play dummy. I am convinced that these experiments
are very bad for your nerves."
"I think so, too, dear."
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