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Page 9
Gregor soon had the opportunity to test the strength of his
decisions, as early the next morning, almost before the
night had ended, his sister, nearly fully dressed, opened
the door from the front room and looked anxiously in. She
did not see him straight away, but when she did notice him
under the couch - he had to be somewhere, for God's sake, he
couldn't have flown away - she was so shocked that she lost
control of herself and slammed the door shut again from
outside. But she seemed to regret her behaviour, as she
opened the door again straight away and came in on tip-toe
as if entering the room of someone seriously ill or even of
a stranger. Gregor had pushed his head forward, right to
the edge of the couch, and watched her. Would she notice
that he had left the milk as it was, realise that it was not
from any lack of hunger and bring him in some other food
that was more suitable? If she didn't do it herself he
would rather go hungry than draw her attention to it,
although he did feel a terrible urge to rush forward from
under the couch, throw himself at his sister's feet and beg
her for something good to eat. However, his sister noticed
the full dish immediately and looked at it and the few drops
of milk splashed around it with some surprise. She
immediately picked it up - using a rag, not her bare hands -
and carried it out. Gregor was extremely curious as to what
she would bring in its place, imagining the wildest
possibilities, but he never could have guessed what his
sister, in her goodness, actually did bring. In order to
test his taste, she brought him a whole selection of things,
all spread out on an old newspaper. There were old, half-
rotten vegetables; bones from the evening meal, covered in
white sauce that had gone hard; a few raisins and almonds;
some cheese that Gregor had declared inedible two days
before; a dry roll and some bread spread with butter and
salt. As well as all that she had poured some water into
the dish, which had probably been permanently set aside for
Gregor's use, and placed it beside them. Then, out of
consideration for Gregor's feelings, as she knew that he
would not eat in front of her, she hurried out again and
even turned the key in the lock so that Gregor would know he
could make things as comfortable for himself as he liked.
Gregor's little legs whirred, at last he could eat. What's
more, his injuries must already have completely healed as he
found no difficulty in moving. This amazed him, as more
than a month earlier he had cut his finger slightly with a
knife, he thought of how his finger had still hurt the day
before yesterday.
"Am I less sensitive than I used to be, then?", he thought,
and was already sucking greedily at the cheese which had
immediately, almost compellingly, attracted him much more
than the other foods on the newspaper. Quickly one after
another, his eyes watering with pleasure, he consumed the
cheese, the vegetables and the sauce; the fresh foods, on
the other hand, he didn't like at all, and even dragged the
things he did want to eat a little way away from them
because he couldn't stand the smell. Long after he had
finished eating and lay lethargic in the same place, his
sister slowly turned the key in the lock as a sign to him
that he should withdraw. He was immediately startled,
although he had been half asleep, and he hurried back under
the couch. But he needed great self-control to stay there
even for the short time that his sister was in the room, as
eating so much food had rounded out his body a little and he
could hardly breathe in that narrow space. Half
suffocating, he watched with bulging eyes as his sister
unselfconsciously took a broom and swept up the left-overs,
mixing them in with the food he had not even touched at all
as if it could not be used any more. She quickly dropped it
all into a bin, closed it with its wooden lid, and carried
everything out. She had hardly turned her back before
Gregor came out again from under the couch and stretched
himself.
This was how Gregor received his food each day now, once in
the morning while his parents and the maid were still
asleep, and the second time after everyone had eaten their
meal at midday as his parents would sleep for a little while
then as well, and Gregor's sister would send the maid away
on some errand. Gregor's father and mother certainly did
not want him to starve either, but perhaps it would have
been more than they could stand to have any more experience
of his feeding than being told about it, and perhaps his
sister wanted to spare them what distress she could as they
were indeed suffering enough.
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