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Page 27
When I have added here that the Pirate scheme was blown to shivers,
by the Pirate-ship which had the Treasure on board being so
vigorously attacked by one of His Majesty's cruisers, among the West
India Keys, and being so swiftly boarded and carried, that nobody
suspected anything about the scheme until three-fourths of the
Pirates were killed, and the other fourth were in irons, and the
Treasure was recovered; I come to the last singular confession I
have got to make.
It is this. I well knew what an immense and hopeless distance there
was between me and Miss Maryon; I well knew that I was no fitter
company for her than I was for the angels; I well knew, that she was
as high above my reach as the sky over my head; and yet I loved her.
What put it in my low heart to be so daring, or whether such a thing
ever happened before or since, as that a man so uninstructed and
obscure as myself got his unhappy thoughts lifted up to such a
height, while knowing very well how presumptuous and impossible to
be realised they were, I am unable to say; still, the suffering to
me was just as great as if I had been a gentleman. I suffered
agony--agony. I suffered hard, and I suffered long. I thought of
her last words to me, however, and I never disgraced them. If it
had not been for those dear words, I think I should have lost myself
in despair and recklessness.
The ring will be found lying on my heart, of course, and will be
laid with me wherever I am laid. I am getting on in years now,
though I am able and hearty. I was recommended for promotion, and
everything was done to reward me that could be done; but my total
want of all learning stood in my way, and I found myself so
completely out of the road to it that I could not conquer any
learning, though I tried. I was long in the service, and I
respected it, and was respected in it, and the service is dear to me
at this present hour.
At this present hour, when I give this out to my Lady to be written
down, all my old pain has softened away, and I am as happy as a man
can be, at this present fine old country-house of Admiral Sir George
Carton, Baronet. It was my Lady Carton who herself sought me out,
over a great many miles of the wide world, and found me in Hospital
wounded, and brought me here. It is my Lady Carton who writes down
my words. My Lady was Miss Maryon. And now, that I conclude what I
had to tell, I see my Lady's honoured gray hair droop over her face,
as she leans a little lower at her desk; and I fervently thank her
for being so tender as I see she is, towards the past pain and
trouble of her poor, old, faithful, humble soldier.
Footnotes:
{1} Dicken's didn't write the second chapter and it is omitted in
this edition. In it the prisoners are firstly made a ransom of for
the treasure left on the Island and then manage to escape from the
Pirates.
End of Project Gutenberg's Etext of Perils of Certain English Prisoners
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