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Page 19
"Yes," Stella answered, "it is true--I have seemed to feel the
cords and the shackles pulling at me often, but never that they
were unbearable until I--spoke with you--and you put new thoughts
into my head."
"I did well, then. And because of a silly convention you would
ruin all your life by going on with these ways--it is
unthinkable!" and his deep voice vibrated with feeling. "It is a
mistake, that is all, and can be rectified,--if you were already
married to this man I would not plead so, because then you would
have crossed the Rubicon, and assumed responsibilities which you
would have to accept or suffer the consequences. But this
preliminary bond can be broken without hurt to either side. A man
of the good clergyman's type will not suffer in his emotions at
the loss of you--he suffices unto himself for those; his vanity
will be wounded--that is all. And surely it is better that should
gall for a little than that you should spoil your life. Sweet flower,
realize yourself these things--that sunny hair and that beautiful
skin and those velvet eyes were made for the joy and glory of a
man--not for temptations to a strict priest, who would resent
their power as a sin every time he felt himself influenced by
their charm. Gods above! he would not know what to do with you,
heart of me!"
Stella was thrilling with exquisite emotion, but the influence of
her strict and narrow bringing up could not be quite overcome in
these few moments. She longed to be convinced, and yet some
altruistic sentiment made her feel still some qualms and
misgivings. If she should be causing Eustace great pain by
breaking her engagement; if it were very wrong to go against her
uncle and aunt--especially her Aunt Caroline, her own mother's
sister. She clasped her little hands nervously, and looked up in
this strong man's face with pathetic, pleading intensity.
"Oh, please tell me, what ought I to do, then--what is right?" she
implored. "And because I want so much to believe you, I fear it
must be wrong to do so."
He leaned nearer to her and spoke earnestly. His stillness was
almost ominous, it gave the impression of such immense self-
control, and his voice was as those bass notes of the priests of
St. Isaac's in his own northern land.
"Dear, honest little girl," he said tenderly, "I worship your
goodness. And I know you will presently see the truth. Love is of
God and is imperious, and because she loves him is the only reason
why a woman should give her life to a man. Quite apart from the
law, which proclaims that each individual must be the arbiter of
his own fate, and not succumb to the wishes of others, it would be
an ethical sin for you to marry the worthy Mr. Medlicott--not
loving him. Surely, you can see this."
"Yes--yes, it would be dreadful," she murmured, "but Aunt
Caroline--she caused me to accept him--I mean, she wanted me to so
much. I never really felt anything for him myself, and lately--
ever since the beginning, in fact, I have been getting more and
more indifferent to him."
"Then, surely, it is plain that you must be free of him, darling.
Throw all the responsibility upon me, if you will. I promise to
take every care of you. And I want you only to promise you will
follow each step that I explain to you--" then he broke off, and
the seriousness of his tone changed to one of caressing
tenderness. "But first I must know for certain, little star, shall
I be able to teach you to love me--as I shall love you?"
"Yes," was all Stella could utter, and then, gaining more voice,
she went on, "I did not know--I could not guess what that would
mean--to love--but--"
He answered her with fond triumph:
"Now you are beginning to understand, darling child--that is
enough for me to know for the present. In your country, a man asks
a woman to marry him: he says, 'Will you marry me?'--is it not so?
of course, I need not say that to you, because you know that is
what I mean. When these wearisome thongs are off your wrists you
will belong to me, and come with me into my country and be part of
my life."
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