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Page 95
Pall-bearers should be asked either by note
or by a representative of the head of the
family of the deceased.
The pall-bearers assemble at the house at
the appointed hour, and there take the
carriages reserved for them. They disperse
after the church service.
Except in the case of young women, carriages
are not sent to bring pall-bearers to
the house.
CALLS. After accepting an invitation to act as a
pall-bearer, a man should call at the house of
the bereaved and leave his card.
A few days after the funeral he should call
again and leave his card. If he wishes, he
may simply ask at the door after the women
of the family.
DRESS. The pall-bearers wear black frock coat,
trousers, and waistcoat, a black silk hat with
a mourning band, black shoes, and black kid
gloves. The linen should be white
FLOWERS. Unless there has been a request not
to send flowers, a pall-bearer may do so after
his first call.
If he wishes, a few days after the funeral
he may send flowers to the women of the
family with his card, on which should be
written: With the compliments of -----.
INVITATIONS. The invitation should be promptly
accepted or declined, and if accepted only
illness or unavoidable absence from the city
would excuse a man from attending.
PAPER WEDDING. The first wedding anniversary is
called the paper wedding, and is not usually
celebrated. If, however, it is celebrated,
the invitations may bear the words: No
presents received. Congratulations should be
extended in accepting or declining the
invitations. Any article of paper would be an
appropriate gift. An entertainment should
follow.
PARTIES. These are less formal than balls.
They generally begin at nine or nine-thirty,
with dancing at ten-thirty or eleven. The
supper precedes the dancing. Those who do
not take part in the dancing may leave
before it begins.
INVITATIONS. These are engraved, giving hour
for beginning in lower left-hand corner, and
should be sent two weeks in advance. One
envelope only need be used. They should
be answered promptly.
PATRONESSES. It is customary for the management
of any institution giving a public ball to
formally invite six, eight, or more married
women to act as patronesses, and for their
names to appear on the invitations. If
badges are worn, each patroness is sent one
or given one at the ball-room.
The patronesses, after being welcomed at
the ball by the management committees, take
their places, ready to receive the guests.
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