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Page 20
Now, before she ever had heard of Mrs. Legrand, Miss Ludington had fully
believed that her former self had an immortal existence, apart and
distinct from her present self, and Paul, to whom she was indebted for
this belief, held it even more firmly than she.
But there is a great difference between the strongest form of faith and
the absolute assurance of sight. The effect of the vision which they had
witnessed in Mrs. Legrand's parlours was almost as startling as if they
had not expected to see it.
Very little was said in the carriage going home, but, as they were
crossing the ferry, Miss Ludington exclaimed, in an awestruck voice,
"O Paul! was it not strange!"
"Strange? Strange?" he echoed, in strong, exultant tones. "How oddly you
use the word, aunty! You might well say how strange, if we mortals were
isolated here on this little island of time, with no communication with
the mainland of eternity; but how can you call it strange when you find
out that we are not isolated? Surely it is not strange, but supremely
reasonable, right, and natural."
"I suppose it is so," said Miss Ludington, "but if I had let you go alone
to-night, and stayed at home, I could never have fully believed you when
you told me what you had seen any more than I shall ever expect any one
to believe me. Think, Paul, if I had not gone, if I had not seen her, if
she had not given me that look! I knew, of course, if she appeared that I
should recognize her, but I did not dare to be sure that she would
recognize me. I remember her, but she never saw me on earth."
"It was as a spirit that she knew you, and that is the way she knew me,
and knew that I loved her," said Paul, with a sudden huskiness in his
voice.
"Surely that makes it clear," said Miss Ludington, "that the spirits of
our past selves love us who follow them, as we, in looking back, yearn
after them, and not merely await us at the end, but are permitted to
watch over us as we complete the journey which they began. I am sure that
if people knew this they would never feel lonely or forlorn again."
It was a relief to Paul when they reached home and he could be alone.
In an ecstasy of happiness that was like a delicious pain, he sat till
morning in his unlighted chamber, gazing into the darkness with a set
smile, motionless, and breathing only by deep, infrequent inhalations.
What were the joys of mortal love to the transports that were his? What
were the smoky fires of earthly passion to his pure, keen flame, almost
too strong for a heart of flesh to bear?
As he strove to realize what it was to be beloved by an immortal, the
veil between time and eternity was melted by the hot breath of his
passion, and the confines of the natural and the supernatural were
confounded.
As the east grew light he began to feel the weariness of the intense
mental strain which had led up to, and culminated in, the transcendent
experience of the previous evening. A tranquil happiness succeeded his
exalted mood, and, lying down, he slept soundly till noon, when he went
downstairs to find Miss Ludington anxiously waiting for him to reassure
her that her recollection of the last night was not altogether a dream,
as she had half convinced herself since waking.
Paul had to go into Brooklyn to do some business for Miss Ludington that
day, but the men he dealt with seemed to him shadows.
After finishing with them he went over to New York, and presently found
himself on East Tenth Street. He had not intended to go there. His feet
had borne him involuntarily to the spot. He could not resist the
temptation of drawing near to the place where she had been only a few
hours before. He walked to and fro before Mrs. Legrand's house for an
hour, and then stood a long time on the opposite side, looking at the
closed windows of the front parlour, quite unconscious that he had become
an object of curiosity to numerous persons in adjoining houses, and of
marked suspicion to the policeman at the corner.
Finally he crossed the street, mounted the steps, and rang the bell. The
door was opened, after a considerable interval, by Alta, the elfish
little girl. Paul asked for Mrs. Legrand. Alta said that her mother was
ill to-day, and not able to see any one. Paul then asked for Dr. Hull. He
was not in.
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