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Page 12
CHAPTER II
DINNERS
ABOUT THE AMERICAN HOSTESS
The greatest pride of the American hostess is her formal dinner. And it
is to her credit that we mention that she can hold her own against the
most aristocratic families of Europe.
There is a story told of a well-known New York society matron who gave a
formal dinner party on every occasion that warranted it, no matter how
trivial, for the reason that it gave her keen pleasure and enjoyment to
do so. At one of her dinners recently a famous world-touring lecturer
was the guest of honor--and the hostess was as happy and proud as it is
possible for a hostess to be. Especially was she proud of the delectable
menu she had ordered prepared for the occasion.
But much to her chagrin, she noticed that her distinguished guest was not
eating the tempting hot dishes--only the vegetables, and relishes and
fruits. She did not wish to appear rude, but she could not wait until
dinner was over before asking him why he was not eating. "I am a
vegetarian," he answered, "and I never indulge in meats."
The hostess-of-many-dinners had an inspiration. Here was an opportunity
to give a unique dinner-and nothing could be more delightful for her. A
week later, she sent out invitations to all her friends requesting their
presence at another formal dinner to be held in honor of the visiting
lecturer. This time it was a vegetarian dinner. Suffice to say that it
was a huge success.
Such is the hospitality of our American hostesses that they will concede
to every whim and desire of their guests. They must be pleased at all
costs. The dinner is not a success unless each guest leaves a little
happier than when he came and incidentally a little better pleased with
the person who happens to be giving the dinner.
PLANNING THE FORMAL DINNER
First in importance, of course, is when shall the formal dinner be held?
Any evening of the week may be selected--although Sunday is rarely
chosen. The hour is usually between seven and eight o'clock.
Invitations should be mailed a week or ten days before the date set for
the dinner. The hostess may use her own judgment in deciding whether the
invitations should be engraved on cards, or hand-written on note paper.
The former is preferred for an elaborate dinner, the latter for a small
one.
It must be remembered in inviting guests to dinner, that it is a breach
of etiquette to invite a wife without her husband, or the opposite. A
married couple must always be invited together. If there are other
members of the family who are desired as guests at the dinner, separate
invitations must be sent to them. A dinner card is always addressed to a
husband and wife, and individually to single persons.
For the convenience of the host, it is a point of courtesy for every
recipient of an invitation to dinner, to answer promptly. A good rule is
to decide immediately upon receiving it whether or not you will be able
to attend, and follow it with a cordial answer within the next
twenty-four hours. If you find that you must refuse, there must be a
very good reason for doing so.
In planning the dinner party, the hostess must go over her list of
friends and carefully select six or eight who would naturally be most
congenial together. The number may even be as low as four, and while
there can be no absolute limit to the number one may invite, there must
never be more than the hostess can handle easily. If the guests are
chosen carefully, with a regard for their likes and dislikes, the dinner
is bound to be a happy one.
ARRANGING THE TABLE
To set the formal dinner table correctly is an art in itself.
The appointments of the modern dinner table are a delight. Services are
of silver and china is of the finest. Both the square or round table are
appropriate, the latter being the most popular since it is easier to make
attractive. A mat of asbestos or a thickness of canton flannel is first
spread on the table. Over this comes the snowy, linen table-cover,
falling gracefully over the sides with the four points almost touching
the floor. A place is laid for each guest. The most fashionable method
is to have a large lace or embroidered doily in the center of the table,
and smaller ones indicating the position of the guests. A centerpiece of
glass, china, silver, is usually used, over the doily or without it, and
on top of this, flowers. Delicate ferns are sometimes used instead of
flowers, although roses (hot-house roses when no others are obtainable)
are always the favorite at an elaborate dinner.
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