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Page 68
"Because I understand the position of Signor Carella and
of you, it's no reason that--"
"None at all. Fight as if you think us wrong. Oh,
what's the use of your fair-mindedness if you never decide
for yourself? Any one gets hold of you and makes you do
what they want. And you see through them and laugh at
them--and do it. It's not enough to see clearly; I'm
muddle-headed and stupid, and not worth a quarter of you,
but I have tried to do what seemed right at the time. And
you--your brain and your insight are splendid. But when you
see what's right you're too idle to do it. You told me once
that we shall be judged by our intentions, not by our
accomplishments. I thought it a grand remark. But we must
intend to accomplish--not sit intending on a chair."
"You are wonderful!" he said gravely.
"Oh, you appreciate me!" she burst out again. "I wish
you didn't. You appreciate us all--see good in all of us.
And all the time you are dead--dead--dead. Look, why aren't
you angry?" She came up to him, and then her mood suddenly
changed, and she took hold of both his hands. "You are so
splendid, Mr. Herriton, that I can't bear to see you
wasted. I can't bear--she has not been good to you--your
mother."
"Miss Abbott, don't worry over me. Some people are born
not to do things. I'm one of them; I never did anything at
school or at the Bar. I came out to stop Lilia's marriage,
and it was too late. I came out intending to get the baby,
and I shall return an 'honourable failure.' I never expect
anything to happen now, and so I am never disappointed. You
would be surprised to know what my great events are. Going
to the theatre yesterday, talking to you now--I don't suppose
I shall ever meet anything greater. I seem fated to pass
through the world without colliding with it or moving it--and
I'm sure I can't tell you whether the fate's good or evil.
I don't die--I don't fall in love. And if other people die
or fall in love they always do it when I'm just not there.
You are quite right; life to me is just a spectacle,
which--thank God, and thank Italy, and thank you--is now more
beautiful and heartening than it has ever been before."
She said solemnly, "I wish something would happen to
you, my dear friend; I wish something would happen to you."
"But why?" he asked, smiling. "Prove to me why I don't
do as I am."
She also smiled, very gravely. She could not prove it.
No argument existed. Their discourse, splendid as it had
been, resulted in nothing, and their respective opinions and
policies were exactly the same when they left the church as
when they had entered it.
Harriet was rude at lunch. She called Miss Abbott a
turncoat and a coward to her face. Miss Abbott resented
neither epithet, feeling that one was justified and the
other not unreasonable. She tried to avoid even the
suspicion of satire in her replies. But Harriet was sure
that she was satirical because she was so calm. She got
more and more violent, and Philip at one time feared that
she would come to blows.
"Look here!" he cried, with something of the old manner,
"it's too hot for this. We've been talking and interviewing
each other all the morning, and I have another interview
this afternoon. I do stipulate for silence. Let each lady
retire to her bedroom with a book."
"I retire to pack," said Harriet. "Please remind Signor
Carella, Philip, that the baby is to be here by half-past
eight this evening."
"Oh, certainly, Harriet. I shall make a point of
reminding him."
"And order a carriage to take us to the evening train."
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