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Page 77
Her eyes were shining. In the dusk her color came to him like the
glimmer of a flower.
"Kenny!" she exclaimed. "How wonderful it all is, you and all of it!
And yet if--if I feel as I do, you must let me go for a year.
Otherwise if I lack confidence in myself--Oh, can't you see, Kenny, I
shall be shy and frightened and always ill at ease!"
"Go!" he echoed blankly.
"Somewhere," said Joan, "to study music and French and how to talk your
kind of nonsense. Hannah says there must be money enough in Uncle's
estate for that."
"Where," said Kenny, his heart cold, "would you go?"
"I thought," said Joan demurely, "that perhaps I could study in New
York where I wouldn't be so--lonesome."
He caught her in his arms.
"Heart of mine!" he whispered. "You thought of that."
"Then," said Joan, "I can learn something of your world before I become
a part of it. Don't you see, Kenny? I can look on and learn to
understand it. I should like that. Come, painter-man! The tea's
cold. And it's growing dark. We'd better light the lamp."
With the tea-pot singing again on the fire and the lamp lighted, Kenny,
but momentarily tractable, had another interval of rebellion. Joan, in
New York, might better be his wife. Joan, studying, might better have
him near to talk his sort of nonsense, listen to her music and make
love volubly in French to which she needed the practice of reply. His
plea was reckless and tender but Joan shook her head; and Kenny
realized with a sigh that her preposterous notion of unfitness was
strong in her mind and would not be denied.
"A year, Kenny!" pleaded Joan. "After all, what is a year? And at the
end I shall be so much happier and sure." She came shyly to his chair
and slipped her arms around his neck. "I want so much to do whatever
you want me to do. And yet--and yet, Kenny, feeling as I do, I shall
be--Oh, so much happier if you will wait until I can come and say that
I am ready to be your wife."
"It will make you happier!" he said abruptly.
"Yes."
"Then, mavourneen," said Kenny, "it shall be as you say. I care more
for your happiness than for my own."
They went back through the darkness hand in hand.
CHAPTER XXIII
A MISER'S WILL
Kenny lingered moodily over his supper. His evening was casting its
shadow ahead. He dreaded the thought of climbing the stairs to Adam's
empty room. If he could have kept his hostile memories in the face of
death, he told himself impatiently, it would have been easier. But
Garry was right. He was wild and sentimental. Only pitiful memories
lingered to haunt him: rain and loneliness and the old man's hunger for
excitement.
He went at last with a sigh, oppressed by the creak of the banister
where Adam had sat, sinister and silent in his wheel-chair, listening
to the music. Memories were crowding thick upon him. Again and again
he wished that he had never opened the door of the sitting room that
other night and caught the old man off his guard. It had left a
specter in his mind, horrible in its pathos and intense. Strung
fiercely to the thought of emptiness, it came upon him nevertheless, as
he opened the door, with a curious chill sense of palpability; as if
silence and emptiness could strike one in the face and make him falter.
The room was fireless and silent and unspeakably dreary. Hughie had
left a lamp burning upon the table. The key he had found in the pocket
of the old man's bathrobe lay beside it.
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