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Page 37
Perhaps it was because time hung so heavily on his hands that Trevlyn
went so frequently to Mrs. Lee's. Certainly he did not go to visit
Alexandrine. We all know how the habit of visiting certain places grows
upon us, without any particular cause, until we feel the necessity of
going through with the regular routine every day. He was to blame for
following up this acquaintance so closely, but he did it without any
wrong intention. He never thought it possible that any one should dream
of his being in love with Alexandrine.
But the world talked. They said it was a very pretty romance; Mr. Trevlyn
had been deserted by his lady-love, had fallen ill on account of it, and
been nursed by one whom of course he would marry. Indeed, they thought
him in duty bound to do so. In what other way could he manifest his
gratitude?
Vague whispers of this reached Trevlyn's ear, but he gave them at first
little heed. He should never marry, he said; it was sinful to wed without
love. But as he saw Alexandrine's pale face and strangely distraught
manner day by day, he came to feel as if he had in some way wronged her
though how he did not exactly understand.
One day he entered the sitting-room of Mrs. Lee with the freedom of a
privileged visitor, without rapping, and found Alexandrine in tears. He
would have retreated, but she had already seen him, and he felt that it
would be better to remain. He spoke to her kindly.
"I trust nothing has occured to distress you?"
She looked at him almost defiantly.
"Leave me!" she said, impetuously; "you, of all others, have no right
to question me!"
"Pardon me" he exclaimed, alarmed by her strange emotion, "and why not
_I_ question you?"
"Because you have caused me misery enough already--"
She stopped suddenly, and rising, was about to leave the room. He took
her hand, and closed the door she had opened, leading her to a seat.
"My dear Miss Lee, I do not comprehend you. Explain. If I have ever
injured you in any way, it has been the very thing farthest removed from
my intentions. Will you not give me a chance to defend myself?"
She blushed painfully; her embarrassment disturbed him, for he was
generous to all, and he really felt very kindly toward her.
"I cannot explain," she said, in a subdued voice. "I am sorry you came
just now. But these slanders anger me, as well as wound my feelings."
"What slanders, Miss Lee?"
Her color grew deeper. Animated by some sudden resolve, she lifted her
head proudly.
"I will tell you. Remember that you sought the information. Your coming
here has been made the subject of remark, and I have been accused of
having schemed to draw you here. You know if it be true."
His face flushed slowly. He recalled the silly stories that had some time
before reached his ears. And because of them she had suffered! This woman
whose unremitting care had saved his life! How thoughtless and cruel he
had been! He was a man of honor; if any woman's reputation had been
injured through his means, there was but one course for him to pursue.
He must make reparation. And how? For a moment his head whirled, but
glancing at the pale, distressed face before him, he made his decision.
"Alexandrine," he said, quietly, "you know just what my course has been.
You know my lowly origin--you know how life has cheated me of happiness.
You know how dear Margie Harrison was to me, and how I lost her. I loved
her with my whole soul--she will be the one love of my life time. I shall
never love another woman as I loved her. But if my name, and the position
I can give my wife, will be pleasant to you, then I ask you to accept
them, as some slight recompense for what I have made you suffer. If you
can be satisfied with the sincere respect and friendship I feel for you,
then I offer myself to you. You deserve my heart, but I have none to
give to any one. I have buried it so deep that it will never know a
resurrection."
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