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Page 62
"Really," she said, "it is much better than candle--a little difficult
to masticate perhaps, but, if I do say it myself, quite a tolerable
flavour. If I only hadn't used that abominable French polish this
morning. What do _you_ think, Mr. Dod?"
"I think," said Dicky, jumping suddenly to his feet, while my heart
stood still with anticipation, "that if there's enough of that shoe
left, you had better put it on again, for I hear people calling us," and
then, making a trumpet with his hands, Dicky shouted till all the
Roman skeletons sufficiently intact turned to listen. But this time the
answer came back from their descendants, running with a flash of
lanterns.
[Illustration: Dicky shouted till the skeletons turned to listen.]
* * * * *
I will skip the scene of our reunion, because I am not good at matters
which are moving, and we were all excessively moved. It is necessary to
explain, however, that Brother Demetrius, when he went above ground,
felt his lumbago so acutely that he retired to bed, and was therefore
not visible when the others came up. As we had planned beforehand, the
Senator decided to go on to the Jewish Catacombs, taking it for granted
that we would follow, while Brother Eusebius, when he found Demetrius in
bed, also took it for granted that we had gone on ahead. He did not
inquire, he said, because the virtue of taciturnity being denied to them
in the exercise of their business, they always diligently cultivated it
in private. My own conviction was that they were not on speaking terms.
Our friends and relatives, after looking at the Jewish Catacombs, had
driven back to the hotel, and only began to feel anxious at tea time, as
they knew the English refreshment-rooms were closed for the season, like
everything else, and Isabel asserted with tears that if her mother was
above ground she would not miss her tea. So they all drove back to the
Catacombs, and effected our rescue after we had been immured for exactly
seven hours. I wish to add, to the credit of Mr. Richard Dod, that he
has never yet breathed a syllable to anybody about the manner in which
Mrs. Portheris sustained nature during our imprisonment, although he
must often have been strongly tempted to do so. And neither have
I--until now.
CHAPTER XV.
"The thing that struck me on our drive to the hotel," remarked momma,
"was that Naples was almost entirely inhabited by the lower classes."
"That is very noticeable indeed," concurred Mr. Mafferton, who was also
there for the first time. "The people of the place are no doubt in the
country at this time of the year, but one would naturally expect to see
more respectable persons about."
"Now you'll excuse me, Mafferton," said the Senator, "but that's just
one of those places where I lose the trail of the English language as
used by the original inventors. Where do you draw the line of
distinction between people and persons?"
"It's a mere Briticism, poppa," I observed. Mr. Mafferton loathed being
obliged to defend his native tongue at any point. That very morning the
_modus vivendi_ between us, that I had done so much for Dicky's sake to
establish, had been imperilled by my foolish determination to know
why all Englishmen pronounced "white" "wite."
"I daresay," said poppa gloomily, "but I am not on to it and I don't
suppose I ever shall be. What struck me on the ride up through the city
was the perambulating bath. Going round on wheels to be hired out, just
the ordinary tin tub of commerce. The fellows were shouting
something--'Who'll buy a wash!' I suppose. But that's the disadvantage
of a foreign language; it leaves so much to the imagination."
"The goats were nice," I said, "so promiscuous. I saw one of them
looking out of a window."
"And the dear little horses with bells round their necks," momma added,
"and the tall yellow houses with the stucco dropping off, and especially
the fruit shops and the flower stalls that make pictures down every
narrow street. Such _masses_ of colour!"
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