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Page 33
It was not without sundry heartbeatings that Rose heard the carriage
stop, and assisted Helen to alight; nor could she conceal her
astonishment at the ravages which not past years but past emotions had
wrought on her once beautiful face.
The habit of suppressing thoughts, feelings, and emotions, had
altogether destroyed the frank expression of her exquisitely chiselled
mouth, which, when it smiled now, smiled alone; for the eyes, so
finely formed, so exquisitely fringed, did not smile in unison; they
had acquired a piercing and searching expression, altogether different
from their former brilliancy.
The elevated manners, the polished tone which high society alone
bestows, only increased the distance between the two cousins, though
Rose was certainly gratified by the exclamation of pleasure which told
how much better than she anticipated were the accommodations prepared
by her humble relative.
"Such pretty rooms--such beautiful flowers! Rose, you must have grown
rich, and without growing unhappy. Strange, you look ten years younger
than I do!"
"Late hours, public life, and anxieties," said Rose.
"Yes, that last appointment his lordship obtained, the very thing
above all others I so desired for him, has completely divided him from
his home. We hardly ever meet now, except at what I may call our own
public dinners."
"And he, who used to be so affectionate, so fond of domestic life!"
involuntarily exclaimed Rose.
"And is so still; but the usages of society, the intrigues and bustle
of public business, quite overthrow every thing of that kind. Oh, it
is a weary, wearying world!"
"But to a mind like yours, the achieving an object must be so
delightful!"
"Ay, Rose, so it is; but that sort of thing soon passes away, and we
have no sooner obtained possession of one, than another still more
desirable presents itself. How peaceful and happy you seem. Well, an
idle mind must be a perpetual feast."
"But I have not an idle mind, not an idle moment," replied Rose,
colouring a little; "my husband, my children, my humble household, the
care of the parochial schools, now that poor Mr. Stokes has grown so
infirm"--
"Yes, yes!" interrupted Helen; "and yet, Rose, when I look at you,
even now, I cannot but think you were fitted for better things."
"Better than learning how to occupy time profitably, and training
souls for immortality!" she replied; "but you are worn and tired, let
me wait upon you this one night, as I used long, long ago to do--let
me wait upon my own dear cousin, instead of a menial, this one night,
and to-morrow you shall see Edward and the children."
The worn-hearted woman of the great world laid her face upon her
cousin's shoulder, and then fairly hid it in her bosom. Why it was, He
only, who knows the mysterious workings of the human heart, can tell;
but she wept long and very bitterly, assigning no cause for her tears,
but sobbing and weeping like a sorrowing child, while the arms she had
flung round her cousin's neck prevented Rose from moving. Their tears
once more mingled, as they had often done in childhood--once more--but
not for long.
"Leave me alone for a little, and I will ring for my maid," she said
at last; "I am too artificial to be waited upon by you, Rose. It was
otherwise when you used to twine gay poppies and bright flowers in my
hair, telling me, at the same time, how much wiser it would have been
to have chosen the less fading and more fragrant ones."
"Her husband--and her children!" thought Helen; "if she had neither
children nor husband, she would have been of such value to me now;
noisy children, I dare say, troublesome and wearying. Native air!
native air, indeed, _ought_ to work wonders." It would be hardly
credited that Helen--the beauty--the admired--the woman of
rank--bestowed quite as much trouble upon her morning toilette as
if she had been in London. Such was her aching passion for universal
sway, that she could not bear to be thought faded by her old lover,
though he was only a farmer; and this trouble was taken despite bodily
pain that would have worn a strong man to a skeleton.
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