|
Main
- books.jibble.org
My Books
- IRC Hacks
Misc. Articles
- Meaning of Jibble
- M4 Su Doku
- Computer Scrapbooking
- Setting up Java
- Bootable Java
- Cookies in Java
- Dynamic Graphs
- Social Shakespeare
External Links
- Paul Mutton
- Jibble Photo Gallery
- Jibble Forums
- Google Landmarks
- Jibble Shop
- Free Books
- Intershot Ltd
|
books.jibble.org
Previous Page
| Next Page
Page 6
Perhaps I ought to explain that the house that Jack built, intending to
establish Jill as its mistress when it should be completed, had proved
most unsatisfactory to that extremely practical young woman. In
consequence, she had obstinately refused to name the happy day till the
poor, patient fellow had kept bachelor's hall nearly a year. At last,
in consideration of an unqualified permission to "make the house over"
to any extent, the rough place that threatened to upset them was made
smooth. Her father's present, wisely withheld till peace was declared,
left nothing to be desired, and they started on their wedding journey
as happy as if they owned the universe. This excursion, however, came
near being a failure from the sentimental standpoint, because, wherever
Jill discovered a house that gave any outward sign of inward grace, it
must be visited and examined as to its internal arrangements. Naturally
this struck Jack as an unromantic diversion, but he soon caught the
spirit, and after much practice gave his salutatory address with
apparent eagerness:
"My wife and I happen to be passing through town and have been struck
by the appearance of your house. Will you kindly allow us to have a
glimpse of the interior?"
The request was invariably granted, for nothing is more gratifying than
the fame of having the "finest house in town." Unhappily the interiors
were never satisfactory to Jill, and her valedictory to the owners of
the striking houses seldom went beyond thanks for their courtesy.
"We visited several houses on our trip," she observed to her father--
"Several hundred," said Jack--
"But were disappointed in them all. Many of them must have cost more
than ours will cost, but the money seemed to us foolishly spent."
"Yes," said her husband, "we concluded that the chief plank in the
platform of the architects and builders was 'Millions for display--not
one cent for comfort.'"
"Well, Jack, we have learned one thing on our travels--where _not_ to
look for the plans of our house."
A box of letters from her dear five hundred friends awaited Jill's
return, and a whole afternoon was devoted to them. Each letter
contained some allusion to the new house. At least ten conveyed
underscored advice of the most vital importance, which, if not
followed, would demoralize the servants, distress her husband and
ultimately destroy her domestic peace. Taken at a single dose, the
counsel was confusing, to say the least; but Jill read it faithfully,
laid it away for future reference, and gave the summary to her husband
somewhat as follows:
"It appears, Jack, my dear, to be absolutely indispensable to our
future happiness that the house shall front north, south, east and
west."
"Let's build it on a pivot."
"We must not have large halls to keep warm in cold weather, and we
_must_ have large halls 'for style.' The stories must not be less than
eleven nor more than nine feet high. It must be carpeted throughout and
all the floors must be bare. It must be warmed by steam and hot water
and furnaces and fireplaces and base-burners and coal grates."
"We shan't have to go away from home to get into purgatory, shall we?"
"Hush! The walls of the rooms must be calcimined, painted, frescoed and
papered; they must be dyed in the mortar, finished with leather, with
tiles, with tapestry and with solid wood panels. There must be
blinds--outside blinds, awnings, inside shutters, rolling blinds,
Venetian shades and no blinds at all. There must be wide, low-roofed
piazzas all around the house, so that we can live out of doors in the
summer, and on no account must the sun be excluded from the windows of
the first story by piazza roofs. At least eight patent sanitary
plumbing articles, and as many cooking ranges, are each the only one
safe and fit to be used. The house must be high and low--"
"I'm Jack and you shall be game--"
[Illustration: COUSIN GEORGE'S EXTERIOR.]
"It must be of bricks, wood and stone, separately and in combination;
it must be Queen Anne, Gothic, French, Japanesque and classic American,
and it must be painted all the colors of an autumn landscape."
Previous Page
| Next Page
|
|