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Page 9
* * * * *
TO MANKIND IN GENERAL--
THEREFORE TO MR. GLADSTONE IN PARTICULAR.
[Illustration]
(_See Speech by Miss Cozens at Meeting of Woman's Emancipation
Union at Birmingham, Oct. 27._)
The time is come, beware of "us,"
There's thunder in the air;
Your future's in the care of "us;"
Beware of "us"--beware!
We'll cease to coax and "Cozen" you
By fascinating smiles,
And gaily now impose on you
By dynamitic wiles.
* * * * *
A JUDGE'S LAMENT.
[Q.B.D. = QUEEN'S BENCH DIVISION.]
After the labours of Vacation,
Ten long weeks with nothing to do,
I feel that I need some recreation,
I'll sit in Court for a week or two:
It's just as well, now and then,
To show yourself to the public ken.
Ah me! who would be
Judge of the High Court, Q B.D.?
But it's tiring work to sit on the Bench,
Hearing the Counsel, day by day,
Canting and ranting, while they clench
Their fists, and thump and hammer away:
Be their arguments weak or strong,
Whatever I say I'm in the wrong.
Ah me! who would be,
A badgered Judge of the Q.B.D.?
Whenever I crack a judicial jest,
Witnesses, jurors, suitors smile,
They quite understand I do my best,
A wearisome action to beguile:
"Silks" and "Juniors" seem to force,
A jeering laugh as a matter of course.
Ah me! who would be,
A jocular Judge of the Q.B.D.?
The public, solicitors, counsel, frown
And grumble and growl at the law's delay;
I'm never allowed to stop in town,
Off on Circuit I'm hurried away:
Election Petitions I'm made to judge,
On Irish Commissions I have to drudge.
Ah me! who would be,
A toiling Judge of the Q.B.D.?
To a _cause c�l�bre_ I don't object,
Leaders of fashion around me sit,
My robes and ermine command respect,
I rather fancy I'm making a hit:
I feel there's a chance of getting, who knows?
Into _Vanity Fair_ or Madame Tussaud's.
Ah me! who would not be,
A popular Judge of the Q.B.D.?
When the Sittings are in full swing, I'm bound,
From half past ten till the clock strikes four,
In Court or in Chambers to be found,
With half an hour for my lunch or more:
Summons and motion and cause I hear,
I'm only paid, five thousand a-year!
Many a man would like to be,
Judge of the High Court Q.B.D.
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