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Page 5
ILLUSTRATIONS
PORTRAIT OF MRS. WIGGIN . . . . . . . . . _Frontispiece_
MRS. OLIVER AND POLLY
"IT IS SOME OF THE STUDENTS"
"SHE OPENED THE BOOK AND READ"
[Transcriber's note: The second illustration was missing from the
original book.]
POLLY OLIVER'S PROBLEM.
"Pretty Polly Oliver, my hope and my fear,
Pretty Polly Oliver, I've loved you so dear!"
DINAH MARIA MULOCK.
CHAPTER I.
A DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE.
"I have determined only one thing definitely," said Polly Oliver; "and
that is, the boarders must go. Oh, how charming that sounds! I 've
been thinking it ever since I was old enough to think, but I never cast
it in such an attractive, decisive form before. 'The Boarders Must
Go!' To a California girl it is every bit as inspiring as 'The Chinese
Must Go.' If I were n't obliged to set the boarders' table, I 'd work
the motto on a banner this very minute, and march up and down the plaza
with it, followed by a crowd of small boys with toy drums."
"The Chinese never did go," said Mrs. Oliver suggestively, from the
sofa.
"Oh, that's a trifle; they had a treaty or something, and besides,
there are so many of them, and they have such an object in staying."
"You can't turn people out of the house on a moment's warning."
"Certainly not. Give them twenty-four hours, if necessary. We can
choose among several methods of getting rid of them. I can put up a
placard with
BOARDERS, HO!
printed on it in large letters, and then assemble them in the
banquet-hall and make them a speech."
"You would insult them," objected Mrs. Oliver feebly, "and they are
perfectly innocent."
"Insult them? Oh, mamma, how unworthy of you! I shall speak to them
firmly but very gently. 'Ladies and gentlemen,' I shall begin, 'you
have done your best to make palatable the class of human beings to
which you belong, but you have utterly failed, and you must go! Board,
if you must, ladies and gentlemen, but not here! Sap, if you must, the
foundations of somebody else's private paradise, but not ours. In the
words of the Poe-et, "Take thy beaks from off our door."' Then it will
be over, and they will go out."
"Slink out, I should say," murmured Polly's mother.
"Very well, slink out," replied Polly cheerfully. "I should like to
see them slink, after they 've been rearing their crested heads round
our table for generations; but I think you credit them with a
sensitiveness they do not, and in the nature of things cannot, possess.
There is something in the unnatural life which hardens both the boarder
and those who board her. However, I don't insist on that method. Let
us try bloodless eviction,--set them quietly out in the street with
their trunks; or strategy,--put one of them in bed and hang out the
smallpox flag. Oh, I can get rid of them in a week, if I once set my
mind on it."
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